Today's topic over at Ben Patrick Johnson's twitter is about playful spankings, and what a person might do to earn that fun from their significant other. Now, I have mentioned my BDSM preferences in the past, but some people might not be as obsessive about reading back logs as I am, so let's start with that.
I am a masochistic submissive with a mischievous streak a mile wide. This means that I am usually on the receiving end of any spankings handed out.
...Don't need to use too much to convince me that handing out spankings is a good thing... Just sayin'
- Boy
Boy and I met in 2006, at another mind-numbingly boring thing the employment agency conjured up to make the statistics look better. That time it was different classes meant to improve our chances of landing a job. At the time, I was still recovering from getting rejected by a love interest, but Boy and I immediately became friends and most likely made life very... let's say 'interesting'... for the people trying to teach us things. Two months of hanging out in class and being goofs during breaks, we became an "item". We got engaged on Dec 31 2006 and we got married on Sept 13 2014. April 9 2015 was our 9 year anniversary. Which brings me to Today's Topic.
On April 9 2006, I called Boy and asked him if he wanted to come over and hang out, maybe watch a movie, or something. He came over, he said Hi to my parents, and we went to my room (I was 20 years old at the time, as was he). We talked, goofed around, and I popped Moon Child into the DVD player. At some point during the movie, I decided to start tickling Boy, and things kind of escalated from there. Turns out Boy is -extremely- ticklish. Turns out that I -really- like strong hands restricting the movement of my arms.
Most of what I know about my sexual preferences have come from tickling Boy and him trying to get away. Leaving crumbs in the bed, tickling Boy, or just being a tease can earn me a spanking. Spanking, and other similar things, is a game for us. Both of us like it and it's pleasurable. Having fun and gaining pleasure is the core of BDSM for us.
BDSM stands for Bondage Discipline Dominance/Submission Sadism/Masochism. Spankings would fall under the DSM parts. It can be playful, naughty, and a game. It can be intimate, a way to push limits, and to "punish" a sub in a Scene. Spankings can be used to warm up the skin for heavier play or a way to put all Scene participants in the right state of mind.
Some like punches to chest and thighs.
Some like open hand spanking, some prefer tools. Tools can include paddles, canes, crops, whips, floggers, and belts. Most of those sting. A flogger has more of a thudding impact, while the pain from a whip depends on the number of tails. A single-tail stings more than a nine-tail.
If you use an open palm to spank a partner, remember that full hand impact stings more than grazing with just fingers. An impact with just the meat of the bottom of your palm is more like a punch.
I guess if you want to be a tease, use your fingers to spank with. It gives an impact, but let's the person sit down without cringing too much. Slapping someone's butt right before dinner with the in-laws is just evil (but fun). Yes, I speak from experience, and yes, I was on the receiving end.
No matter what you prefer, remember to always make sure it's ok. Spanking a stranger is creepy and wrong. Spanking your partner can be sexy.
DFTBA
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