Decades past

30 years ago, I was resting in a hospital crib. I was three hours old and I imagine that I wa still rather blue tinted and wrinkly.
I was expected to be born on New Year's Eve, but something happened and I decided that November 30 was a day good as any to be born. Thanks to the emergency c-section I now have a very easily identifiable feature - a small white scar on my left ear. By now, it's about one centimeter long and half a millimeter thick.

My life has not been easy. I've faced hard ships in the shape of bullying, abusive boyfriends, mental problems, loneliness, and financial difficulties. And yet, I am happy for the life I've had so far. I have been blessed with amazing family, both biological and chosen, brilliant friends, and breath taking experiences. During my 30 years in this body, I've traveled to three continents and 14 countries. I have friends I can't live without all over th world. I have a husband who supports my dreams and my development. During the past 16 years, I've gone from a frightened, suicidal little girl to a strong, independent woman who believes in her ability to achieve her dreams.

I have learned so much the past decade alone that I could fill days upon days worth of blog posts with just mind dumps and factual tidbits.

I am a science geek, a history nerd, a SciFi addict. I read fantasy and fantastical stories like I need them to breathe. I binge watch Dr Who, Gotham, and Agents of Shield. I also watch Niel Degrasse Tyson, BBC documentaries, and MIT Open Courseware because I think it's fun.

I am a femnist, an LGBTQIA+ ally, and a human rights advocate. I am asexual, heteronorm non-conforming, and I have a tendency to space out.

I am me. I am the best at being me. The most important lesson I have learned during my 30 years in this life is that no one can be me better than I can, and therefore I am the only one who can make decisions for my well being.

DFTBA

The few divide

An open letter to the individuals thinking they can decide who belongs in the LGBTQIA+ community.

HOW DARE YOU!?

You talk about representation and the importanse of being seen, and yet you want to exclude trans* people from visible forums just because you don't think they belong. Who gave you the right? 

Fine, being transgender isn't a sexual orientation, but according to many, neither is being asexual.

Trans* IS a part of our community for the simple reason that they're an oppressed group in oppossition to the gender norms our heteronormatve society wants to impose on us. Trans* people deserve representation just as much as the rest of us, for the simple reason that they're human beings and therefore deserve respect and a voice. Going against the gender norms, being brave enough to stand up and say "This is me! I do not comform to your idea of me" deserves representation in all media outlets. Who are you to call for exclusion based on craving to live as the gender you are?

As for transgender people's desire to be seen being hostile to the goals of women, who are you to speak for all women? How is demanding equality, equity, and a voice in public arenas hostile to the goals of women? This is, after all, what feminism has been fighting for for the last 200 years. Respect for who you are, regardless of gender, is what feminism is all about, and you say that trans* people are against this. How? 

I am not a transgender person. I have no idea what transgender people struggle with everyday. However, I am a woman and I am asexual, and you do NOT speak for me. I try to be an ally to my transgender friends and family. Trans* people belong in our community, which was founded on an idea of equality for all, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, just as much as I do.

DFTBA