SAFE SANE CONSENSUAL

  - or Why "50 Shades of Grey" is dangerous.

I would like to start by pointing out that I do not ever advocate the banning of books for any reasons. The written word, once published, should be allowed to stay out in the open.
That said, the author is responsible for what they publish. The publisher and editors are responsible for what they let pass their nets. It's up to the editor to say "Hold on. What do you want to say with this text?" If the author self publish, they are fully responsible for their work. The End.

Secondly, I am a masochistic submissive who spends way too much time on google, tumblr and on the Internet in general. It took me YEARS to research everything I wanted to know about the Scene. YEARS!

Now, why is 50 Shades so dangerous? Here's a list.

1. It promotes abuse under the name of BDSM.

- Anyone with the ability to google will find that there's a world of difference between violence and abuse, and S/M play. There are so many rules surrounding BDSM Scene.
 
Safewords.
Consent.
Silent safewords.
Hygene.
Scenario descriptions.
Negotiations.
Contracts.

This is the core of SAFE.

2. If anyone in the Scene feels that something's off, it's no longer Play.

- It is incredibly easy to disguise violence and abuse under the name of S/M Play. That is why there are rules. Strict rules. You do not deviate from the rules if you want to call it Play.

This is also part of SAFE.

3. Negotiations are the foundation of BDSM.

- Talk about EVERYTHING you want from a Scene. Limits, what you want, what you don't want, what you will not do under any circumstances.
Stick to the things you agree on. Do not deviate from the agreements without re-negotiations.
Each Scene should be negotiated before starting. Each Scene is different and should be treated as such.

Negotiations is the main part of SANE and CONSENSUAL.

4. Drugs and alcohol have NO room in BDSM play...

- UNLESS it's part of something the participants of the Scene have previously agree upon. (See negotiations)

This is part of SANE.

5. "50 Shades of Grey" is promoting un-negotiated Master/slave dynamics.

- Some people in the Scene enjoy the M/s dynamic. The difference between pushing someone down and fulfilling someone's need to be subservient is NEGOTIATIONS. If you want a 24/7 dynamic, you need a contract.
There are also major differences between Slave and Submissive. Google it.

A contract fulfills all three aspects of SAFE, SANE, and CONSENSUAL. I have yet to see negotiations or contracts in 50 Shades.

- - - - - - - -

If you want more information about Scene, here are some links.

Quick intro to further reading.
National Coalition for Sexual Freedom
Description of Safe, Sane, Consensual
A Submissive's Guide
A Video

Here are some really good BDSM fanfiction

- Demented Dee writes some amazing fiction, both original and fanfiction
- Liralen Li kicks major writing butt.